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Henrietta the Hound About Town!

We love when Henrietta from Houston Pet Talk Magazine swings by each month to give us her take on matters of the world!  Vote for Henrietta :-)!

My favorite Texan and animal savior is back! My man Kinky is running for Governor again but this time as a Dem-O-Cat (I may have to rethink my disdain for the feline species if the Kinkster thinks their cool). This new run for the Governorship of the Great State of Texas has inspired me to step onto the political stage and run for office too!

When I mentioned my political desires to my cousin Harold, he asked (in his unending riotous wit) if I was running for Head Dog Catcher.  See what I have to put up with? I’m constantly surrounded by dimwits of poor breeding. “No”, I said, “I’m running for Houston Mayor”. I could have sworn I heard Harold mumble something about me never running in my entire life but I didn’t want to waste anymore time on someone whose mother gave birth to 4 puppies in one litter…all with different fathers!

Hound About Town! Henrietta Checks in with Houston Dog Blog!

Our friend Henrietta from Houston Pet Talk Magazine with an update on what's happening in her world! 

It’s life in the fast lane for me these days! With my popularity in “overdrive” I’m finding it hard to get those mundane tasks in life done…like cleaning my room, whitening my teeth, helping my brother with his science project and doing my Kegel exercises (by the way, ALL of these tasks are considered “necessary” by my mother and considered “inconvenient” by me).

Why am I so busy? I thought you’d never ask. First, I take my duties as the all-knowing Hound About Town very seriously so I’ve been attending a lot of events, soirees and well yes…parties! I presided over the Houston PetTalk booth at the Houston SPCA Mutt Strut where I fell in love with a Bulldog wearing a camo vest (until he sneezed on me and I realized life with him would require a permanent umbrella) and I yearned for a Dupioni silk dress modeled in the fashion show until the proprietress of the “establishment” informed me they only come in sizes 2-12. Whatever.

Then, I trotted on to the Rockets’ Tux and Tennies Gala. Dikembe winked at me, I fainted and I don’t remember a thing after that. Sorry, I’ll do better next time.

Next, I’ve been busy keeping up with my blog on houstonpettalk.com. Blogging takes some serious concentration and it’s very important stuff I’m espousing, kinda like national security and global warming; but when I used this analogy for why I should get to stay up late, mom just rolled her eyes and said “Well Henrietta, large brained mammals need EXTRA sleep”. The Dragon Lady lives on.

Finally, I’m managing the voting for the 2009 Henrietta’s Readers’ Choice Awards…don’t forget to cast your vote for your favorites on houstonpettalk.com! So far, lots of readers have cast their votes and I must say the results are quite interesting, especially the “write-ins”. My favorite is the write-in for Best Dog Trainer…a piece of steak!

 

The Dating Game with Henrietta!

Our girl Henrietta from Houston Pet Talk is back and dishing on the doggie dating scene! 

Someone once told me that “lonely” is a state of mind. They obviously have someone to snuggle with in the middle of the night when our Houston thunderstorms are raging outside. I really hate the way a crack of thunder and bolt of lightening in the dark of the night can turn me into one big scaredy cat…. and we all know that the last thing in the world I wish to be is a cat!

Taking matters into my own paws, I’ve decided that fate alone cannot provide me with the destiny I desire….a lovable, loyal mate to share my dreams with or at a minimum someone to buy me a Valentine gift (my standards at times can be quite low). I’ve tried sniffoutamate.com and eightlegsarebetterthanfour.com but no luck. I’m resorting to what all females in the throws of desperation would do…. pimping myself to the dating game. Yes…yours truly has landed a spot on the most public of all meat markets.

In preparation for the show, my friend Narcissa (yes, it’s what you’re thinking) suggested that I ask the bachelors the following questions:
1. How much money do you earn?
2. Will you buy me something in a Blue Box (Sniffany’s is her ultimate)
3. Will you take me to Paris to shop at the real Chanel store?

Well, thanks Narcissa but you and I actually have only one thing in common…a tail. She’s a well-intentioned gal who’s Botox has affected her ability to think straight. No, I am not ruled by baubles, trinkets and the amassing of all things elite. I simply want a good meal that is not produced in a chicken factory. Told you my standards were low.

After a good nap under my favorite tree and a thinking session while knawing on a good piece of hide…no, not that kind of hide! Rawhide, you silly. I’ve come up with my questions:

1. Do you prefer a Barkundy or Merlot when dining on Venison? (This will identify his familiarity with  fine dining…they typically don’t server Merlot at the garbage dumpsters)
2. Do you believe the stomach is connected directly via a feeding tube to the soul? (If he says yes, then I see a pipeline of love in our future!)
3. If you could be any kind of food, what would it be? (If he says milkbone he’s out and if he says hot dog, he’s mine!)

 

Stay tuned for more from Henrietta or see what she has to say at Houston Pet Talk!

It’s Country Time! By Henrietta!

Our friend Henrietta, from Houston Pet Talk is back and sharing her latest insight on staying slim! 

Well, it’s the New Year and I have only gained a respectable 5 lbs from the holidays. I thought that was quite an accomplishment until I was aptly reminded by my cousin Gidget (otherwise known as the Taco Bell Dog) that 5 lbs is 25% of my body weight. Didn’t know I had such a famous cousin?…well…we’re “distant” cousins. Very distant. And besides, why would I listen to someone who’s claim to fame is calling “Here lizard, lizard, lizard”?

So my next trick will be to remove the 5 lbs since swimsuit season is around the corner. I’ve tried Billy Blank’s “Kickboxing For 4 Leggs” and Suzanne Sommers’ “Abs-Olutely Canine”…didn’t work. I’ve tried The South Claw Diet, Cur-Tail and Biscuit Busters. No results. I’ve decided I need a new approach…I’m going to shake it off. UhHuh, that’s right. I’m going to dance those Greenies right off to my newfound love, Country Music.

As I see it, no other genre of music has paid more homage to canines than Country Music and I’m going to return the favor by making it my music of choice and my weight loss muse. Classics like “I Wouldn’t Take Her To A Dog Fight ‘Cause I’m Afraid She’d Win” or “I Was Drinkin’ Out Of The Toilet When Life Gave Me The Flush” are definite “must haves” for my IPAW.

Now, I can think of one more reason to hitch my leash to Country Music. The men are fine. I’ve posted notice at the local watering hole that I’m no longer available. I heard the howls of pain all the way down at the Piggly Wiggly. Yeah, I’m movin’ on to Dierks Bentley (me and his dog Jake could make a good roadie team!). That boy makes my tail wag!…Wonder if he’d write a song for me? It might go something like this:

Went down to Houston where I’d never been before
I ain’t seen such pretty girls with as many legs as four
There’s really a special one that’s just right for me
 She loves a good steak and a sniff of a tree

Our future together would be filled with lots a’ fun
She’d bring me the paper and I’d rub her belly in the sun
As she drinks from the toilet, I’d have a bottle of beer
She’d lick my nose and I’d scratch her behind the ear…